Like turtles? Like cheese? How about bacon? Try this on for size then. These little cuties seem to be on a lot of forum websites but I have failed to find a history. Ohwell, what you really need to know is, "what is a bacon turtle cheeseburger?" I'll tell you. :]
Our hard shelled friends start as a lone batch of hamburger meat that's just waiting to be molded. You take some kosher hot dogs(not that it matters, I would use the one's with cheese in the middle)and you cut them in half and mold the hamburger meat around them so that they're sticking out where arms and legs belong. Then cut a little piece off and give your turtle a head and a long skinny piece for a tail. Next, cover your meaty fetus in cheese. I would not recommend shredded cheese. And now you're ready to make your "bacon weave" around the cheese. Cut your uncooked bacon into squares and place them in a vertical-horizontal-vertical pattern on the burger, effectively covering all the cheese. Poke toothpicks through your burger to hold it together with your turtles arms and legs and bake. Enjoy~
Just to further specify, this is a burger wrapped in cheese that's wrapped in bacon with hot dogs sticking out of it. Right now you're probably foaming out of the mouth. Either from need or disgust. If you are indifferent to this meaty work of are then you have no soul, obviously. If you've already seen this then congrats, you've seen it, you should still be affected. Every time I read about this I feel thick, like my blood is hardening but I want it so badly. SO badly. Although, this is not nearly as bad as the feeling I get when I think about the deep-fried coke. Not nearly as bad at all. It's the cinnamon sugar that really does it, it's just too much for my mind to handle.
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Haha wow those are some crazy man food thats for sure. Talking about ultimate barbeque material. I wonder if they are hard to cook though because there are different times in order to cook the different meats. But thats so funny, talking about death in a bite.
ReplyDeleteI love reading your blog every week because I am so interested in what crazy foods you can come up with week by week. This week, as I was scrolling down the page I came across these turtle thingies. They look like a wonderful substitute to the boring old hamburgers we are all used to. Maybe you should pitch this to McDonalds or Burger King. I would definitely be a repeat customer if this were the case.
ReplyDeleteI would have never thought to put those meats together, but it looks so good! I also like that it's made to look like a turtle, but I feel like I wouldn't want to eat it because it looks so cute!(Although, I'd probably take a picture and eat it anyways, it looks too good.) I wonder who came up with this idea and if they made these burgers look like any other animals?
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